Why Tango?


“Tango was the most helpful in getting over the death of Bob.” Kitty – September 14, 2013

Being open to new experiences in our new single life, one that must be re-built with intentionality, opens doors and provides healing in ways we never dreamed….I had been struggling with finding safe and acceptable options to provide physical touch for many who’ve lost a spouse or significant other. There are some practical and wonderful solutions like massage but, it can take more physical touch to fill the immense void some of us feel.

Last week, a friend set me up with a private tango dance lesson, in the dance studio of Lois Donnay, in Minneapolis. I had no expectations and had never even considered learning to dance the tango. The music touched my soul. As I learned about the sophisticated dance, learning to dance while “hugging” my partner….I had an “aha” moment when It occurred to me that this form of dance is healing, for those grieving, on so many levels.

Lois believes that it is the close contact between two people in milonguero-style tango and adherence to the rhythms inherent in the music that facilitate a level of communication that is profound beyond words. She believes that anyone can create and experience beauty through Tango if they are open in body and heart to their partner and the music.

Lois mentioned that many of her tango students have met and married. She talked about the wonderful community tango provides and when she travels throughout the states and the world, she is always welcomed into tango communities.

Lois went on to tell me that the Tango originated in Buenos Aires. “It is hard to describe, but enjoying life is of paramount importance to the citizens of Buenos Aires. When you are down here, it is all about conversation, enjoying each other, enjoying a dance, enjoying the music – as long as you are happy.

Testimonial 1

From: Julia
Date: Sep 13, 2013
Subject: Tango for grief groups

Dear Lois,

What was wonderful about tango for me as a widow was:

  1. Finding an already formed and welcoming social group to meet and do things with
  2. A way to spend fun weekend evenings without having to invest my own time and energy [planning] (having an opportunity to go to a party Friday, Saturday and Sunday as well as some weekdays)
  3. A way to go out without having a date
  4. The opportunity to see and meet people of the opposite sex without having to make any commitment
  5. The pleasure of holding a gentleman in my arms, without having to make a commitment or feel I was engaging with them in any way other than friendship
  6. A way to get physical exercise while enjoying nice company and beautiful music.


Testimonial 2

From: Kitty
Date: Sep 14, 2013
Subject: Tango for grief groups

Hi Lois,

Tango was the most help in getting over the death of Bob. For one and a half hours every week my mind was elsewhere than on the death of my husband. And, as time went by, that one and a half hours stretched out to be longer and longer. Tango was one of the best things that has ever happened to me regardless of there being a death or not. I highly recommend it, especially to people who are grieving.